The Potting Shed

willow · Star Dust Club Joined: 14 May 2007 Posts: 38

Maybe you should try not letting her go riding, once they realize that you mean what you say and a punishment will be followd through, the next time the behaviour is unacceptable you may find you only have to threaten to take away her riding or other activities she enjoys for a week and her behaviour might improve. I went through a similar thing with my middle son who is now 10 when he was 8, i used to say right thats it you're not going to football or swimming this week, but i always gave in when the day arrived, and it didn't take long for him to cotton on to the fact that i never followed a punishment through, so he would play up as much as he liked because he knew i wouldn't actually do anything about it. Once i did follow it through his behaviour changed almost overnight because he knew that i wasn't the push over i had been before.
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Leonie2 · Posted: Wed May 16, 2007 5:15 pm Post subject:

I agree with willow. It's really hard to do. The school rules are no riding scooters in the school grounds. Every day I had a problem with J insisting on riding her scooter and a battle of wills. The school run with scooters was stressful because she would not listen to me at all, not just the riding in school grounds but racing off ahead along a fairly busy road with me shouting at her in the distance to come back which she ignored. One day I said that I'd take her scooter away if she did it again, which she did. I carried her scooter home not allowing her to ride it, she screamed and had a strop all the way home. I felt like all the mums were looking at me thinking what a horrid mum I was being but I really had to get the message through to J. That was a couple of months ago and she's never ridden her scooter in school grounds again or raced off ahead of me. In fact she's the little "policeman" now telling everyone else off if they do it.

Remember to be consistent, and I really do recommend carrying threats through. If you can't carry a threat through then don't make it in the first place otherwise they quickly learn that when you threaten punishment it means nothing.

Kathy · Posted: Wed May 16, 2007 6:25 pm Post subject:

Becki · Posted: Wed May 16, 2007 6:48 pm Post subject:

I have stopped riding before. She didn't go for 3 weeks in a row before. She knows I'll do it, but it makes no difference. I havn't actually said she can go yet, and she has been better. I'm going to give the completely ignoring her option a go and see how that does Smile

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The Card Bee

alison · Posted: Wed May 16, 2007 6:51 pm Post subject:

Won't matter this week, so you can tell her she can't go. The stables is closed, because they are down at the Devon show everyday, taking horses for the farrier exibit. Found out this morning, but haven't seen you yet, to tell you! I know that is a bit mean, but she will still get the message.

Becki · Posted: Thu May 17, 2007 12:43 pm Post subject:

Well last night E did something silly, so I quietly said that neither of them is goind riding this week and that we are going to use the time to talk about the move, school, firends etc. M said she was really very sorry and E said sorry too. I said that I knew they were but they still wern't going riding. No tantrum. Had a little one this morning but I waited until she had stopped and said good i can talk to you now. I feel abit guilty about the riding thing with it not being on Laughing

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The Card Bee

Leonie2 · Posted: Thu May 17, 2007 1:19 pm Post subject:

it looks like things are getting a little better already becki, keep at it, it will pay off for you. remember to reward them or thank and encourage them for when they're being good Very Happy

alison · Posted: Thu May 17, 2007 1:44 pm Post subject: